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La Tentation d'Exister

Premiere on April 13, 2024, by OHES under the direction of Marc Schaefer at the Palais de la Musique et des Congrès in Strasbourg. The work is dedicated to Marc Schaefer.

Instrumentation :

1 Picc. - 4 Fl.  (Fl. 4 play Alto Fl.) - 2 Ob. - 1 E. H. -  3 Bn.  (Bn. 3 play  C. Bn.) - 1 Eb Cl. - 3 Bb Cl.           (3 musicians per section)  - 1 B. Cl.  - 1 Cl. Cb.  - 1 S. Sx.  - 2 A. Sx.  - 2 T. Sx.  - 1B. Sx. - 1 Bass Sx. -

6 Hn. - 3 Bb Trp.  - 2 Flh. - 3 Trb. - 2 B. Trb. - 2 Euph. - 1 Tuba - 1 Double Bass ( 4 musicians min.) - 

Hp. - 1 Pn. - 1 Timp. - 7 Perc. 

pub. Alfonce Production  - dur. ca 30 minutes

La Tentation d'Exister is a work in response to Cioran's eponymous essay. This composition is part of a diptych with "Visions" for symphony orchestra, choir, and mezzo-soprano solo, and addresses themes of existence, creation, time, and the human condition. The work does not aim to summarize or comment on Cioran's book, but rather to respond to broader ideas, such as the sensation of emptiness and vertigo triggered by its reading. The work is structured in five parts, each exploring different fields of reflection. As the composer states: "In composing this work, I wanted to show that despite all the anxieties that pass through us, despite all our weaknesses, the will to live remains stronger. The sense of beauty is deeply human, driving us to express the best of what human beings are capable of achieving, including in artistic creation."

I - The Dreadful Beauty of the World

The first movement evokes the gesture of birth and life through an incessant trill. This trill can be perceived as the genesis of an anxiety that will accompany the individual throughout their life. However, it can also be understood as a vibration at the origin of all existence. This movement is divided into two parts: the first, nervous, tense, and anxious, reflects the weight and vastness of the vertigo associated with the human condition, inevitably recalling the idea of an end, a fear shared by all. Then, the music calms down, allowing a sense of tranquility and grandeur to emerge. For, even though the human condition may be difficult, brief, and insignificant according to some, the beauty of certain landscapes, feelings, and sensations surpasses this primitive anxiety. Nonetheless, anxiety is never far away and reappears at the end of the movement, accompanied by a pendulum on the glockenspiel, harp, and piano, evoking the motif of fullness previously mentioned, like a ticking symbolizing the time that continues to pass.

II - Collective Solitude

The second movement, more intimate, deals with the solitude inherent in our lives. We are born alone, and we die alone, but we live in society. Sometimes, this feeling of solitude catches up with us in the face of our difficulties, whether concrete or metaphysical, and the presence of others can paradoxically amplify this feeling. Each life flows individually, often without apparent importance, while we search for meaning in our existence. Anxiety reappears in the middle of the movement before disappearing, making way for a return to inner peace, which will be explored later in the work.

III - The Temptation of the Devil

The third movement focuses on the acceptance of our weaknesses and cowardices. Dance, by its very nature seductive, is here represented by the waltz, a dance that has traversed the ages and can be both sensual and terrifying, like Ravel’s. In this work, the waltz is skeletal and then becomes heavy and broken, symbolizing our morals and values challenged by an increasingly individualistic society, engulfing us in our forgetfulness and small cowardices. However, these weaknesses are also part of the beauty of being human, who refuses to be replaced by computer programs. This movement is the heart of the work, comprising two aspects: beauty and vulgarity (or ugliness). The human being is torn between these two poles and ends up succumbing to human weaknesses, which, despite everything, represents the beauty of our condition.

IV - Inner Silence

This contemplative movement marks a turning point in the work, which, unlike "Visions" (the first part of the diptych) and Cioran’s relentless nihilism, neither succumbs to depression nor despair. Inner refuge, spirituality, calm, and peace are great sanctuaries for humanity. Spirituality, when it does not incite violence but promotes peace and solidarity, can be a source of beauty. The human being possesses the unique ability to contemplate the world, listen to it, and resonate with it. Inner peace and silence, here not in the sense of emptiness, are among the most beautiful human aspirations.

V - The Sound of Ants

Finally, the last movement speaks of our small lives, akin to those of ants on the scale of the universe, agitated and convinced of being at the center of the world. But these small lives are insignificant, and that’s okay. The final hammer, reminiscent of Mahler’s in his Sixth Symphony, evokes fate, reduced to insignificance by human agitation and the multitude of lives. Here, however, it is more of a cinematic gesture, a zoom-out projecting us to the far reaches of the universe, away from human agitation. Only the vibration remains, life, stronger than emptiness, stronger than death, the mystery of this vibration, of this question of why life exists. This movement blends all the previous motifs to expel them in a spectacular manner through the final hammer blow.

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